Another striking reminder of the fragility of life is that
of an older couple whose husband has Parkinson’s Disease – as the disease has worsened
over the past decade, how tragic it has been to see the losses involved, both
for the sufferer and the marriage partner.
These two touching examples became the backdrop for a conversation from which these personal reminders emerged:
(1) Cherishing a Human Life
We need to understand how
precious a human life is – when used wisely, it continually offers the
potential to be of service and lasting benefit to many others. Yet, used
unwisely, it is so easy to neglect or squander the gift of life.
Furthermore, we need to respect
the life of others. In this context, for example, think of those who will be
left behind when the time of death arrives – and to leave them something of
long-term benefit. Seek not to leave a mess of unfinished business, requiring valuable
time to sort through and clean up. A loving responsibility, born out of respect
for others, is that we leave our things in order before we depart.
(2) Accepting Impermanence and
Death
We can see the changing and
ephemeral nature of all things all around us – such as days and nights that fly
swiftly by, the changing seasons. At times, life’s circumstances can change
swiftly and unexpectedly.
In this context, take time to
ensure having an up-to-date will – and, again, dispose of as much as possible
while one has the time and energy to lovingly do so. No-one keeps on living
indefinitely – we all have to go, sooner or later!
(3) Understanding Cause and
Effect
Whenever causes and conditions
come together, a result is certain to follow. We all need to do our best to
help others, and to engage in positive deeds.
In this context, the disorganized accumulated
possessions over a lifetime may well be the effect of years of neglect and lack
of discipline. To streamline and restore neatness and order will take
motivation and discipline. (A strategy that can help is to imagine getting
ready for a relocation – imagine preparing for a move. If and when the time for
a move does arrive, one will be much more ready!)
(4) Recognizing Basic Realities
of Life
We may wish to finally come to
terms with the realities of life. The Buddha taught four basic truths: (1) the
reality of suffering which should be understood; (2) the reality of the origin
of suffering which should be abandoned; (3) the reality of cessation of
suffering which ought to be actualized, and (4) the reality of a path to bring
about cessation of suffering which ought to be relied upon.
In this context, understand that
sentimental reasons are not sufficient for hoarding accumulated possessions (including
books). In time, obsessive attachment and clinging only results in
dissatisfaction and a degree of suffering. (Some family treasures should be
kept – and with foresight passed on to family members.)
(5) Streamlining and Downscaling
Realize that in one’s seventies,
one simply does not need “a lot of stuff”! It can take far too much
increasingly precious time and energy to organize and maintain lots of items
around the home – that are simply no longer really needed.
(6) Preparing to Die
Get our affairs in order now –
and so be better prepared for whatever happens. And, remember, one cannot plan
for one’s death – it is a certain reality, but remains uncertain as to its
timing.
(7) Having a Loving View Toward
Life
Serve others by donating to
charities and giving items that are no longer needed. One can have the joy of
being generous and kind to others now, rather than having a lot of items mindlessly
trashed when one has died. If that occurs, gone would be the opportunity for
loving generosity today.
(8) Adopting a Spiritual Path
Earnestly consider having a
spiritual path in life which embraces lasting values rooted in reality. Such a
path will enable a more peaceful death.
Alexander and Eva Peck. (Based on a conversation over a
special 70th birthday meal in one of our favourite restaurants.
November 4, 2019.)
